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What’s the biggest, BOLDEST decision you ever made in your life, mama?

Don’t even try to tell me you’ve never had to get brave and make a big decision. You have.

• You got married — or said no, or got divorced. 
• You went to college — or not. 
• You joined the Free Mama Movement.
• You quit the toxic job, or took the dream job, or built your business.
• You built your family. 

ALL of those are big decisions that took a fair amount of courage.

What pushed you to those decisions? 

You probably already know that one of the biggest and bravest decisions I ever made came from a place of deep pain and despair.

I had a miscarriage, and it led me to quit my job waaaaaayyyyyy before I was ready and start The Free Mama Movement. 

But you might not know that way before that devastating loss, I made other big, bold decisions.

I moved to New York, then to Phoenix, then to Kansas City. Each move was driven by a very clear picture of what I wanted my life to look like. 

Not every decision was the right one. (If you’ve read my book, you know about the New York job I quit before I even started.)

Even so, I don’t regret any of those decisions, because taking bold action helped me get to the right place. 

This summer, I was somewhere in America when I got word that my aunt — who was like a second mother to me — had suffered a stroke. Within a matter of days, we learned that she wasn’t going to survive, and we immediately made our way to Kansas City, to be with my family. 

Long drives have always helped me reflect on my life, and it helped that I was listening to podcasts and parenting courses and mindset trainings, and the thought that kept rattling around in my head was:

I don’t want to wait for one of my parents to die to spend time with the other one.

I’ve spent the last four years asking my parents to move to Houston. It’s not going to happen. But really, what’s keeping us from moving back to Kansas City?

It turns out… nothing. 

We made this decision quickly, and I can’t tell you if it’s the best decision we’ve ever made, but I can tell you definitively that it’s the best decision we can make right now. 

We’ll be with family again, designing a life that meets our needs right now. 

Might we change our minds at some point in the future? We might — but that’s okay. Here’s my take:

Big and bold decisions aren’t about forever. They’re about meeting your needs in the best possible way, based on the information you currently have. Right now, acres of land, homeschooling, and being close to family and longtime friends are what we need, so we’re getting it. 

No decision is un-doable. We moved to Houston five years ago, and now we’re moving back. At the time, Houston was exactly the right move for us, and I don’t regret an instant of our time here, even the terrible, hard times. 

You can design your life. Your actions design your life. If you make — or avoid — decisions, your life will look different. But you’re the person who decides and designs what your life looks like.

Your turn, mama. What do you want your life to look like, and what big bold decision are you facing?

P.S. Need help and encouragement while you design your life? Grab a copy of my bestselling book here!

Woohoo, mama!

That client wants to hire you! There’s just one problem. 

She wants to know how long the project will take. And you have NO IDEA.

Never fear! FreeMamaTV is here to help!In today’s episode, we’ll show you exactly what to say and how to use the Toggl App, even if you have no clue how long the project will take.

Plus, we’ll also cover how you can get much better at estimating your time using the Toggl, and how to position yourself so that you’re never penalized for getting better and more efficient at what you do.

Head on over to FreeMamaTV — it’s the best way to spend the next 6 minutes. 

Be sure & to subscribe to FreeMamaTV so you can be the first to know when a new episode airs!

P.S. Did you catch my latest blog post? I am giving you REAL, tangible advice on how to add value to a Facebook group so that you can actually land clients while you’re spending time online networking!

And if you want MORE Free Mama TV, check out last week’s episode all about the skills that every VA should have – email and calendar management! You won’t want to miss it so you can watch it right here!

Oh, ugh. (Please tell me you don’t do this.)

So there you are, scrolling through your Facebook groups and you come across a post. 

It’s long. And it’s all about the things you’re doing wrong as you work to build your freelance business. With a picture of the original poster on a beach. And the poster has responded to every single comment with some version of, “Thanks, lady! I sent you a little something in your DMs. 💕”

You keep scrolling. 

There’s another post, with someone asking a question about how to set up her invoicing software, which is something you’ve been trying to do, so you dig into the comments. 

I’m a bookkeeper, and I can set this up for you. PM me for details. 

I’m a VA and I would love to serve you! Here’s my calendar link!

I help busy entrepreneurs gain back their time by taking tedious tasks off their hands! If you’d like to learn more about me, visit my website!

DM’d you!

Don’t these people see how these comments come across?

You keep scrolling — until a comment catches your eye. 

Here’s a video that will show you exactly how to set it up!

You click the video. It’s 2 minutes long, it shows you exactly how to set up the software, and ends with “Let me know if you have any questions!”

You heart the comment. You click the commenter’s name (Leslie) and check out her profile. It’s easy to find a link to her business page, so you head there. 

Whoa. There are a bunch of helpful videos. Leslie knows her stuff!

You like her business page. 

Over the next two months, you notice Leslie’s videos in your feed, and when you land your second retainer client, you reach out to schedule a call with Leslie. A few weeks later, you hire her.

What’s the difference?

“Adding value” in Facebook groups is NOT

• Telling other people what they should or shouldn’t be doing
• Hawking your services
• Dropping your links all over 
• DM-ing people without their permission

Instead, it’s…

• Listening
• Answering questions with helpful answers without pitching yourself
• Connecting people when an opportunity comes up
• Showing up and serving

Someone else’s Facebook group is NOT the place to point out the mistakes you see people making, or three tips for smart networking or any other “value” post, unless you have the explicit permission of the group owner. 

Because it’s clear to allllll of us reading your post that what you want is for people to say, “Oh, hey, can I hire you?”

That’s not adding value in Facebook groups. That’s being self-centered.

You’re better than that. 

Look for opportunities to serve. They’re all around you, and when you shift your focus, you’ll see them everywhere. 

P.S. Want more Facebook netiquette and networking tips? Check out this social media optimization training on FreeMamaTV!

News flash! Running a business takes quite a bit of time — and since time is a non-renewable resource, clients are happy to pay the people who give them more time. 

With the right skills, you can save your clients a ton of time — and they will be thrilled. So today on FreeMamaTV, we’re digging into two of the biggest time sucks for business owners: email and calendar management.  

Sure, you already know how to manage your own email, but it can be a little bit different when you’re handling email and calendar management for a client.

On this week’s episode we’ll take a close look at what you need to know to create an amazing customer experience — and make yourself invaluable to your clients. 

Don’t miss it!

Be sure & to subscribe to FreeMamaTV so you can be the first to know when a new episode airs!

P.S. Did you catch my latest blog post? If you’ve ever felt like you couldn’t ask for help, I’m tell a little story about why I hired a glitter fairy. You won’t want to miss it!

Also, I just released a new episode of FreeMamaRadio YESTERDAY – if you have ever thought about opening a business with your spouse…but then thought immediately how bad that could be for your marriage…you are going to want to listen to this episode ASAP! Sway Buckley is giving us the deets on how to start a business with your spouse — without killing your marriage! You can listen more right here!

I have a confession to make, mama

I hate glitter. 

In fact, I hate basically ALL arts and crafts.

Now, “hate” is a strong word, but it’s almost not strong enough to describe how I feel about crafting and glitter and paint and yarn and —

You get the picture. It’s not my thing. 

When we decided to homeschool the kids this year, I knew I was going to need help. Some facts:

• I run a business (it’s called The Free Mama Movement. Have you heard about it? 😉).
• Justin works full time.
• Audrey is a pre-schooler, and needs A LOT of hands-on activity time, plus she can’t read instructions.
• Daphne is AWESOME at reading instructions and independent work, but I think it’s somewhat irresponsible to just hand her the curriculum and send her off to complete it.
• Henry needs more hands-on instruction than I anticipated, and it is amazingly rewarding to watch him master new concepts.
• We’ve taken on the responsibility of educating these kids, and that’s a LOT.

Justin and I took a long, hard look at our lives and our responsibilities, and we quickly figured out that while we could handle things like sports, math, and handwriting, art was not going to be our thing.

Also, we knew that we needed dedicated time to do our jobs, or there would be no income. 

So we began the search for a babysitter.

Enter the Glitter Fairy. 

She LOVES crafts. She has ENDLESS patience. She is KIND. 

In other words, she is strong where I am weak, which makes her perfect for this role. 

In the mornings, Justin and I tag team teaching the kids. In the afternoons, the Glitter Fairy swoops in and waves her magic wand. Justin and I go to work, and the kids get to crafting.

It’s taken time to build this routine — we started back in August. Has it always been perfect? HECK NO. Is it a privilege to be able to pay a sitter? HECK YEAH. 

The thing is, waiting around for your Glitter Fairy doesn’t work. 

We needed help and structure and routine. For us, that looked like hiring help. 

Yeah, you might have to get super creative to figure out how to get the things you need.

Can you team up with another family?

Can you work out a schedule with your partner?

Can you institute daily quiet time?

Can you set up a daily video chat with grandparents or cousins or friends?

If your answer to everything is, “That won’t work for me,” then you’re not looking hard enough for solutions. 

I know that’s hard to hear, but you have to hear this: You cannot hit your goals by yourself. It takes a village to figure out what your village looks like.

Ask for what you need, Mama. 

Stop waiting for your Glitter Fairy and go out and get her. Asking for help is actually a sign of strength

P.S. Do you have your tickets for FML LIVE yet? You’re going to want to get on that, because there’s a cool announcement coming soon!

Sooo… homeschooling. And not just homeschooling…homeschooling while working full time. During a pandemic. Let’s add that to the list of things 2020 taught us about ourselves, right?

I definitely never imagined myself as this person, but here we are, homeschooling while working full time, and we’re Free Mamas, so we’re going to make the best of it.

This week on FreeMamaTV, we’re diving into the strategies you need if you want to work full time and homeschool your kids. 

Spoiler: it’s a bit like juggling. 

You’ve got the skills, and on FreeMamaTV we’ll show you the strategy for keeping all those balls in the air. We got this!

Be sure & to subscribe to FreeMamaTV so you can be the first to know when a new episode airs!

P.S. Did you catch my latest blog post? It’s all about how to get what you want – even when it feels like it’s the impossible!
One of the most important things you need to know about building your freelancing business is that not every journey is the same. Your timeline is unique to YOU — your reality, your kids, your situation, your abilities, your finances — all of it.

Also, I just released a new episode of FreeMamaRadio YESTERDAY – if you have ever felt like you’ve just had TOO many decisions, then you are NOT going to want to miss this one. I want to talk about how we can take some of those decisions off your plate, and save your energy for the really important ones. I’m going to give you five ways to eliminate decision fatigue as a busy working mom. These are tried and true ways that I make my own life easier, so hopefully, they can do the same for you. Don’t make your life more difficult than it needs to be, mama. Let go of the things that aren’t important and save that energy. 

There you are, mama, building your freelancing business, when you suddenly notice someone else who offers the same service, and who is more successful than you are.

Maybe she’s getting tagged every time someone asks about your shared speciality.

Maybe you’re watching her social media posts full of testimonials. 

Maybe she’s just everywhere you want to be. 

Instead of putting this woman on a pedestal — or worse, thinking of her as “the competition” — what if you considered the following:

• She started 6 months before you did, so she’s simply a little further in her journey than you are
• She’s already working with a coach, so she’s moving faster than you are
• Her children are older than yours, so she’s getting more sleep and has more working hours than you do
• She’s clearer on what she wants, so she’s more able to spot opportunities than you are

One of the most important things you need to know about building your freelancing business is that not every journey is the same. Your timeline is unique to YOU — your reality, your kids, your situation, your abilities, your finances — all of it.

You’re not in competition with anyone, and there’s no need to put people — whether they’re peers, mentors, or coaches — on a pedestal and think that what they’ve achieved is impossible for you to achieve. 

The very fact that someone else did the thing you want to do means the thing is doable. 

And if it’s doable, you can do it, too.  That’s how you get what you want!

One of my Inner Circle mamas, the amazing Casey Rucker, started out as a VA and quickly shifted to copywriting. She looked around and saw my copywriter, Abbi Perets, and Abbi’s right-hand woman at the time, Free Mama Amy Matos. 

“When people are talking about successful writers, I want them to say Abbi and Amy and Casey,” Casey told me, and then immediately gasped. 

She didn’t know what she wanted until the words fell out of her mouth. But the moment she got CLEAR on that desire, things started happening. 

It’s not magic. It’s not luck. 

It’s being AWARE of what you want, and RECOGNIZING the opportunities that are in front of you that allow you to get what you want.

Casey knew she wanted to be VISIBLE as a copywriter. So when I announced I was looking for people to speak up as part of Free Mamas Unite, Casey volunteered, despite her fear and discomfort. 

She got herself in front of Brooke Markevicius from Allobee (formerly Momentum), , and established herself as an expert on the platform.

And Abbi brought her on as a Student Mentor inside of Writing for Money.

All of those things happened because Casey made them happen. She didn’t sit around waiting for things. She figured out what she wanted, and then she went after it. 

Look, mama. I’m into math and science and definitive answers, and I don’t believe in magic. I believe that luck is where preparation meets opportunity. And I ALSO believe that when you articulate what you really want, you are fulfilling the preparation part of the equation.

Once you declare your intentions, you’ll be WAY more open to SEEING and RECOGNIZING the opportunities that the Universe puts in front of you.

(Okay, I’m SLIGHTLY more “woo” than I was in the past. I’m growing.)

If you’re putting people on pedestals, or deciding that other people are “lucky,” I urge you to look more closely at your own journey.

Are you CLEAR on what you want?

What are you doing to PREPARE?

Are you RECOGNIZING opportunity?

Do the things. Because you can.

P.S. Are you ready to start making your own luck — and make things happen for yourself? Then you need to get yourself signed up for Free Mama Live. It’s a TWO WEEK event where you’ll learn exactly how to get clear on what you want, figure out the step-by-step path to get there, prepare every part of your life for success, and put yourself directly in front of the right opportunities. 

You can keep standing on the sidelines and wishing…

… or you can be a part of Free Mama Live. 

P.P.S. Did you catch the latest episode of Free Mama TV? I’m telling you about the best FREE virtual assistant tools you absolutely NEED in your business!